GREG GUTFELD: Resumes with non-binary pronouns are the perfect red flag

Nice, huh? Yeah, keep going. Happy Wednesday, everybody. Oh, I'm so excited. As you know, it's National Women's History Month and what am I doing to celebrate it? I'm buying every woman in my life a new ironing board.

ANNOUNCER: A sexist would say!

I think at this point, we could lose that. Anyway, just last week, we saw Hershey's putting a transgender woman on their chocolate bars to celebrate this magical month. Yeah. Sorry, Susan. B Anthony, your face doesn't want to make people eat. But putting a transgender activist on a chocolate bar that's got to score a few woke points. Even if the candy bar should have been this one, but, one of my classic favorite candy bars.

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Why am I bringing this up? That's a good question. Well, it's another example of a huge corporation signaling to all that they're woke, which is the same as saying, "Hey, please ignore our sweatshops, slave labor and unhealthy products. If we call you the right pronouns, you might not mind the diabetes we gave your parents and the fat asses we gave your kids." But this is the nature of corporate America. However, it could be changing. 

A study from Business.com. Do we have to still say dot.com? It claims that job-seekers with non-binary gender pronouns on their resumes are less likely to be contacted, which is interesting, but why are we telling them this? They already ---- and moan about enough stuff and if they keep the pronouns on their resume, it's a perfect red flag for companies to steer clear of these idiots. But maybe it's a good sign, maybe companies have learned that the hysterical obsession with identity can harm your company pretty bad. I mean, look at Disney. It's so bad, Peter Pan started identifying as Tinkerbell. Now she's out of work running drugs for the Pirates of the Caribbean. Turning tricks for Goofy. You didn't know he was a pimp, did you? 

So apparently they sent out two fake resumes, one that included pronouns, they/them under the person's name and one that didn't. They used a gender ambiguous name, Taylor Williams, which was also my stage name when I used to dance at the Bent Carat back when that was cool. Now they got drugs for it. Turns out those with the pronouns got 8% less interest than the one without and fewer interview requests too. The lesson, it's always best to go the Brian Kilmeade route, wait to disappoint people after you're hired. So it appears some companies saw they/them and thought this person might be in a----hole. They did the same thing with resumes that say Keith Olbermann.

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And follow-up interviews with hiring managers confirmed it. Here's some of the quotes: "Take off the pronouns. I would trash the resume for that reason alone." "I'm not interested in the drama that a person who thinks they are a they/them brings with them." That's a great point. "Personal pronouns are better reserved for social settings, not in a job setting." So it makes sense, a resume should just be the list of the jobs you've been fired from and lies about your charity work. For years, I claimed I rescued Baby Jessica from a well, when in fact I was the one who put her there. But there's a serious reason not to hire the woke. 

A new study from Baylor University explains how woke employees terrorize their bosses into following their silly religion. It turns out that power hungry middle management in places like H.R. or marketing, they guarantee themselves a job by creating woke initiatives that no one can comprehend and therefore criticize. It's brilliant. "How dare you fire me? I'm the company's only non-binary person of color who helped launch Be Kind to Gay Orphans Day. Fire me and that's homophobia." 

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And since wokeism has its own made up language, those who can wield it can appear more capable than those who don't. As The Wall Street Journal explains, "The diversity, equity and inclusion jargon alone makes such initiatives 'difficult for outsiders, including top managers, to understand' and thus to challenge." The result? These middle managers play a huge role in spreading this left wing ideology to corporate culture. 

Researchers even concluded there's actually little evidence of systematic support for their ----. But execs green light them anyway out of fear that their younger subordinates or outside consultants will rat them out. Meaning, it's a grift. You know it. I know it. Everyone knows it. Yet it still goes on because of cowardice.

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So the next time a resumé with a litany of pronouns lands on your desk, hire them if they're the best qualified. That's what companies should have been doing all along. But let's keep the activism where it belongs. In Larry Kudlow's hot tub.