Gutfeld: FEC rules Twitter did not violate election laws over Hunter Biden article
'Gutfeld!' panel discusses how Twitter suppressed the New York Post's article exposing Hunter Biden's laptop last October
Let’s talk about corrupt elections.
I know, I know, there is no corruption, Greg, stop it. Our elections are as flawless as Pete Hegseth’s hair. And like a Rubik's cube covered in blue, they’re impossible to tamper with.
Of course, you can hack our banks, our servers, NASDAQ, DOD, our fuel lines, but that can’t happen with elections, right?
Like trying to make Kilmeade a sex symbol, it can’t be done.
But if you believe that, you don’t understand how elections or the media work.
In 2016, they got stung by the Trump victory, and like the rest of the know-it-all left, they couldn’t let it go.
Just ask Hillary Clinton who still insists she lost due to Russian collusion, low blood sugar, and pass interference.
But not because she’s the most disliked first lady since hepatitis.
I know, hepatitis is not a first lady, but I couldn’t think of one worse than Hillary.
It’s not just about votes. It’s about controlling those votes through media manipulation, which is what we saw in 2020.
Hunter was a gift for Trump, so it was killed faster than your victim’s parakeet. You don’t want it to talk.
But, on Monday, the Federal Election Commission, or FEC, ruled that Twitter wasn’t in violation of election laws when it suppressed the New York Post’s explosive story.
Of course, that ruling was as surprising as Brian Stelter stealing the last donut at the homeless shelter. He volunteers strictly for the food.
If you remember, just weeks before the election, the Post published revelations pulled from the laptop focusing on the insane business dealings Hunter had while his dad was VP.
These revelations were confirmed by the DOJ. There was money-laundering, special favors, hookers and blow, and then more hookers, and then more blow. It reminded me of Kat’s sweet 16.
It was a lot of sick crap, but Jack Dorsey was standing by with a giant pooper scooper.
Lucky for Joe, because Hunter was the only person that had a sneeze guard installed over his computer screen. Anyone who hacked that drive would need a shot of penicillin.
Which is why the story got buried. Because with the Dems, social media, and the press being their respective pallbearers, they could do it.
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If you so much as tweeted the article, you were thrown off Twitter faster than Betty White on a mechanical bull.
This was, of course, a response to Clinton’s email story, which they still blame for 2016.
It was definitely her boring emails and not the fact that she spent more time with the cast of "Hamilton" than she did the people of Wisconsin.
No journalist wanted to be ostracized for reporting the story that led to another four years of Trump.
It really is that simple. No more book parties, no more media appearances, no more happy hours. So they all just looked the other way while pretending to run toward the burning building.
That’s how you sway an election.
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How did the New York Times report on this? They tweeted that the FEC dismissed the accusations that Twitter violated election laws by blocking an "unsubstantiated" article about Hunter.
"Unsubstantiated."
This from a news organization that built entire narratives on "unsubstantiated."
If you took all anonymous news sources away from the Times, all you would have is the crossword for your lactose intolerant kitty to s--- on.
So, Twitter gets away with it, which means they’ll get away with it again.
Whenever there is someone running they don’t want, they can turn the spigot of news on or off to help someone win or make sure someone loses.
They can even simply ban accounts of public officials while allowing the Taliban and China to run rampant on their platform.
Look at Larry Elder.
He could have been the first Black governor in California’s history.
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And how did the press react? They united under a vile narrative in which the Black man running for office becomes the face of White supremacy. And ignore a White woman in a gorilla mask attempting to egg him.
This was repeated in various media outlets, in support of the Whitest face to ever grace the French Laundry without a mask.
If Newsom were any Whiter, he would pee Chardonnay. It goes great with mussels.
Chardonnay, not pee.
Speaking of which, I wonder what the Angry White Male thinks of this.
Tom Shillue, Angry White Male: Look, I happen to think that in the last election a lot of things were done to help the Democrats. But if you say that out loud, they’ll scream and yell. After they screamed and yelled for four years saying that 2016 was rigged. Listen, I’m not going to let it get to me. I tend to only get upset over the big things.
That’s how it works.
After Twitter suppressed the Biden news, the liberal media got the green light to do the same thing.
CNN called the story "too disgusting to repeat on air," which should have been their exact headline on how Larry Elder was attacked by a White woman in a gorilla mask.
Yeah, Hunter Biden was too disgusting for CNN, who still employs Chris Cuomo, who spent hours on air promoting his brother, Governor Happy Hands.
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So who needs foreign interference in our elections when our legacy media has perfected the process right here at home.
Russia and China have nothing on Jack Dorsey and Twitter because they don’t actually really care about the spread of misinformation as long as they’re the ones in charge of doing it.
This article is adapted from Greg Gutfeld's opening monologue on the Sept. 16, 2021, edition of "Gutfeld!"