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Well, they finally got Big Orange. You were starting to think it could never happen. How could it happen? Once you accused a man of racism, fascism, sexism, embezzlement, perjury, sex crimes, mental illness, treason (The last of which, by the way, is a death penalty offense, let us remind you) and then you impeach him twice on related grounds and after that, you send the FBI to his home to seize a handwritten welcome letter from Barack Obama, which turns out to be a state secret possession of which is a serious felony. 

After you do all of that and they have, you wouldn't think there'd be a lot left to accuse the guy of. You'd think they'd have run out of sins, but no, it turns out there's one left and it's the big one.  

The crime of all crimes, an offense so diabolical, so morally repugnant, so contrary to the laws of God and nature that once revealed to the public, Donald Trump is done forever. He will never again darken the door of American democracy. He will slink back in shame to his lair off the fifth tee to prepare for his well-deserved punishment. We won't see him again until sentencing. That's how bad this is. What, ladies and gentlemen, did Donald Trump do? We can now tell you. Donald Trump created the COVID vaccine. He did that himself and on purpose, with malice aforethought.  

The vaccine is Donald Trump's doing. We learned that this week from Democrats in Congress. They announced that shocking news. An investigation by the Coronavirus Subcommittee found, as Politico put it, that the Trump administration pressured the Food and Drug Administration to authorize the first COVID-19 vaccines on an accelerated timeline. Following this?  

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Trump Ivanka National Security

President Donald Trump, accompanied by Ivanka Trump, speaks before signing the National Security Presidential Memorandum to Launch the "Women's Global Development and Prosperity" Initiative (AP Photo/Andrew Harnik)

An accelerated timeline. They didn't even fully test the stuff. That's not science. Donald Trump doesn't do science. So, they just handed this stuff out to people, citizens, recklessly. In the words of South Carolina Congressman James Clyburn, Donald Trump "assaulted" our nation's public health institutions with this poison, the so-called vaccine, and in doing so "undermined our nation's coronavirus response." That's what Trump did and here's the worst part. No one knew Trump was doing it.  

They trusted Donald Trump. He was the president of the United States. People believed him when he said the vaccine worked, especially older people. They knew they were at risk and they wanted to believe that a shot would keep them safe. So, they took Donald Trump's word and then they took the vax, and then a lot of them got covered anyway. It's horrifying when you think about it. Here is one of Donald Trump's elderly victims. 

PRESIDENT BIDEN: Hey, folks, guess you heard this morning I tested positive for COVID, but have been double vaccinated, double boosted, symptoms are mild, and I really appreciate your inquires and concerns and I'm doing well. We're getting a lot of work done and I continue to get it done. 

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Look at that man. Donald Trump's vaccine did that to him. Four shots, a human pincushion, now a desiccated husk. Before he took Donald Trump's vaccine, that man was spry, filled with vigor, and then famous for his mental acuity. Look at him now and in case you think, "Oh, maybe we're overstating the case. I mean, this is a bad video," we're going to take you now to a live shot of that same man to give you some sense of the long-term effects of Donald Trump's vaccine. Here he is speaking at this moment in the state of Maryland. Watch this.  

BIDEN: Social Security into the hands of Ted Cruz and Marjorie Taylor Greene. I mean it, but it's not just Social Security. Senator Scott wants everything in the federal budget voted on de novo. Every five years it goes out of existence. That includes Medicare, veterans benefits and everything else. Then along comes Senator Ron Johnson of Wisconsin.  

Marjorie Taylor Greene controls Social Security? It doesn't make sense. The compassionate person in you feels for that man because you know what happened to him. He took Donald Trump's vaccine, which Democrats alerted us this week, wasn't properly tested. Now, your first reaction would be, "Wait a second, this seems like a revision of what I saw personally. Wasn't it Joe Biden who promoted the vaccine, who made it mandatory? Wasn't Joe Biden in charge when it became obvious the vaccine didn't work? And didn't Joe Biden's media tell us to get the shot months after Donald Trump left office?" You may remember that possibly because you remember clips like this.This is from July of last year.  

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JOE SCARBOROUGH, MSNBC: If you're a schoolteacher, if you're a nurse, if you're a cop, you need to get vaccinated and if you don't, you need to look for another job.  

Yeah, take the vax or you're fired. In retrospect, it's pretty obvious they were carrying water for Donald Trump in that video. Now, if you're still not convinced, you're probably a cynical person, probably have concluded the Democrats are panicked about being blamed for the single greatest public health disaster in history and they're trying to shift the blame to Donald Trump before the full truth about the vaccine comes out and it is coming out and the midterms are on the way. You may have concluded that, but we're not cynical on this show. In fact, we're relieved .  

Now that Donald Trump is responsible for the vaccine, we can finally talk about the vaccine. Until now, we haven't been able to. Until now, it's been like living in a John Cheever story where the entire country is an emotionally repressed wasp family. It's 1952 and Darien and Dad has just passed out drunk at the dinner table, but nobody's allowed to mention it. We all have to pretend it's not happening. "Dad's fine. Be quiet." Over time, that level of denial is very hard to sustain. It makes you crazy, but thank God it's over now. 

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Now that we can blame Donald Trump for the vaccine, we can finally tell the truth about the vaccine without being fired or attacked or thrown off the Internet. We really should have thought of this earlier because it feels good, the freedom of this. So, let's take a moment to talk about Donald Trump's vaccine and why it seems to be, among other things, dramatically raising death rates among young people.  

According to data from New Zealand, the government there, for example, children who were vaccinated between the ages of 10 and 19, were more likely (not less likely) more likely to die within a month of vaccination than those who didn't take the vaccine in the same age group and it's not just the New Zealand government that has found this. This summer, a Dutch researcher called André Redert  published a paper entitled "COVID-19 Vaccinations and all-cause mortality." 

The research analyzed hundreds of cities and towns. What did it find? "We could not observe a mortality reducing effect of vaccination in Dutch municipalities after vaccination booster campaigns. We did find a 4-sigma significant mortality enhancing effect during the two periods of high unexplained excess mortality." 

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Oh, so the data suggests, don't prove, but suggests the vaccine may be killing people. Unexplained mortality is also on the rise in many other countries—Australia, England, Wales. So why is Donald Trump's vaccine doing all of this in other countries? Well, we can't be sure, but as Alex Berenson reported on his Substack recently, the Canadian government is seeing a similar problem at huge scale. 

As of this summer, people who took Donald Trump's vaccine in the Canadian province of Manitoba are roughly 50% more likely than the unvaccinated to be hospitalized or die from COVID. Again, to pause, how bad is Donald Trump's vaccine? So bad that people who take it are more likely to die of COVID. Hmm. Now we have data from more Canadian provinces, but they seem to be hiding it now. On July 28, the province of British Columbia announced it would stop reporting the number of deaths that occurred in people who have taken the COVID booster. Wow. Why is that? Don't ask. You're not allowed to. Oh, we are now because it's a Trump crime.  

The charts are also missing somehow from the Internet archive, which is widely known, of course, as a front for Russian operatives working on behalf of who? Donald Trump, but we do have the most recent available data. What do those show? Well, they show that 70% of all deaths in that province occurred in people who are boosted, even though boosted individuals make up just half the province's population. Do the math on that for a minute. 

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Well, your first reaction might be, "Oh, well, vaccinated and boosted people tend to be older, so of course, they're dying at a greater rate. It has nothing to do with the shot," but then you look deeper. You read, for example, the Lancet article entitled "Risk of Infection, Hospitalization and Death up to nine months after a second dose of the COVID-19 vaccine" and that piece shows that people over the age of 80 have worse outcomes and by worse, we mean more hospitalizations, more deaths when they're vaccinated than when they are unvaccinated.  

So, it turns out when Donald Trump told you, as he did hundreds of times, certainly you must remember this, that this is a pandemic of the unvaccinated, it turned out to be exactly the opposite and we're seeing this in a lot of different places, in a lot of different data sets. In fact, as Kenji Yamamoto wrote in the Journal of Virology, "The Lancet study showed that immune function among vaccinated individuals eight months after the administration of two doses of COVID-19 vaccine was lower than that among unvaccinated individuals." 

That sounds like it's hurting people's immune system in a profound way. As the Journal of Food and Chemical Toxicology put it after an independent study, "Vaccination introduces a profound impairment in type one interferon signaling which has diverse adverse consequences to human health." That doesn't sound good. What consequences could they be talking about?  

Former President Trump FBI raid Mar-a-Lago

Former President Donald Trump arrives at Trump Tower, late Tuesday, Aug. 9, 2022, in New York. AP Photo/Yuki Iwamura  (AP Photo/Yuki Iwamura)

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Well, in July, the German government put out a Tweet stating that at least one out of every 5,000 COVID shots causes "serious side effects." One in 5,000. Really? This is a shot that was taken by hundreds of millions of people, including in this country. What effects are they actually talking about? Well, those would include decreased sperm counts. The journal Andrology reported in June that there was a 22% average drop in total sperm count in samples taken 3 to 5 months after the second Pfizer dose of the vaccine, Donald Trump's vax. 

On top of that, there is heart inflammation, myocarditis, which is now suddenly famous in neighborhoods across the country because everyone seems to know someone else's son who has it. In December of last year, researchers at Oxford found that, "myocarditis risk was increased during 1 to 28 days following a third dose of the vaccine. Associations were strongest in males younger than 40 years for all vaccine types," but you knew that because you're seeing it among people you know and no one's talking about it.  

We're not allowed to talk about it, but now we can because Trump did it. Researchers in Israel, meanwhile, found that vaccination increased the 42-day risk of myocarditis by a factor of three. It's a very serious heart condition, not a small finding. Now, you may have also noticed the rise in young athletes dying of heart attacks in recent months, something you're not allowed to notice, but you probably can't help yourself.  

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For example, a 37-year-old cycling champion in Scotland called Rab Wardell just died of a heart attack two days after winning a national mountain biking championship. Can't say he was out of shape. Maybe it wasn't vax related. Have you seen that a lot before? Hmm and then there are those five doctors you may have read about in Toronto who died in the same month in July. Now, of that group of five dead physicians, there was a 27-year-old triathlete who died after a swimming competition and a 50-year-old Olympian who died after a run. So, these are not people who are sitting on the couch smoking weed and eating Doritos.  

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Now, we can't know why all of this happened, but the point is we're allowed to notice now, and that's significant, especially since some places are still forcing children to take the vaccine and that would include most colleges in the United States. They just announced that boosters are mandatory. In the District of Columbia, which is falling apart, the mayor has decided, she declared this today, that unvaccinated students will not be allowed in school. 

They won't even get virtual learning unless they take a vaccine, Donald Trump's vaccine, that appears to be hurting a lot of people, but unless they take it, they will get no education whatsoever. Hmm. Who knew that Muriel Bowser, the resolutely partisan Democrat who runs Washington, D.C., was actually working for Donald Trump, but she appears to be. At least you know who to blame.